exercise journal

Notes I’ve Written to Myself in the Last Year Since Starting Weightlifting


March 14: I trust myself. I trust my body.

March 18: Investing in my current + future self

March 19: Trust in your body, it knows what to do.

March 22: I am doing the best for my body + my body knows what to do.

March 25: I’m grateful for my body and trust in its wisdom. [not sure if I really felt this today]

March 27 – LTG: I want to and will feel good with my 1st few steps out of bed in the morning.

April 1: I see results when I put in the right amount of work/mindset. I just started week 5 of this plan and see changes in my body composition even though the scale hasn’t moved much.

April 3: No one is going to care as much as you do. It takes time.

April 8: I see myself getting stronger + healthier and MAINTAINING that for the rest of my life.

April 12: I am building muscle! • It’s okay to be hungry • I can see my upper abs even at 194lb! Sweating A LOT, it feels good!

April 14: It’s okay to be a little hungry 🙂

April 24: Find external focuses other than food/cooking/recipes/old food blog type stuff.

April 30: Think about more unilateral movements to improve overall “everyday” strength and flexibility-maybe as a superset (ss)

May 1: Stay focused. Don’t procrastinate.

May 21: Your mind gives up before your body.

July 15: I’m in control of my life.

August 28: Isolated movements like below really seem to keep me “present” on all the little muscles worked.

December 4: Tired today but I did it!

December 12: TIRED LEGS – UGH is how I felt.


February 12: Started doing exercise “set” all together with 1 minute rests. First time trying this in almost a year of weightlifting. I felt muscles were more focused and tired/worked – in a good way.

February 17: I want to prioritize sleep!

February 18: Pretty good leg and hip power

February 19-mantra: I am healthy as I can be. My nails are strong and feeling really good.

February 20: When I’m eating to fit a moving calorie target that’s based on my daily activity & deficit—that could be different everyday—it feels like A LOT of work that becomes tiring and obsessive vs. when I set a calorie goal based on a weeks average with macronutrient goals—this all feels so relaxing and my body/digestion feel really good.

February 21: I’ve got this! I’m strong and have done some amazing work to get here!

February 24: Focus on macros. There are no bad foods. [there are no bad foods but there are foods that fuck with my digestion, but that is a whole different thing-this is about categorizing foods as good or bad]


Eggs in Bags (said in Chicagoan speak)

Currently in pdx for a few days and thought it would be fun to document what I ate this trip 2 years post-veganism.

I made two Chemex this morning, one for immediate enjoyment and one for the car. I added Great Lakes collagen, Silk vanilla soy creamer, and a small amount of mct oil.

Breakfast was one and a half hard boiled eggs and two slices of sesame Ezekiel bread toasted with butter. *kisses fingers*

We left around 10 a.m. and at about two p.m. stopped for gas and snacks as we didn’t feel like a proper meal when we passed through Pasco. I grabbed two hard boiled eggs (which we split), a peanut butter chocolate Cliff Builder Bar, mozzarella stick wrapped in prosciutto, and some fancy adult lunchable that we split.

After checking into our downtown hotel room I dealt with an overflowing menstrual cup and jean washing in the sink. Fun! Thankfully no permanent staining! We then headed up to NW twenty-third for new jeans and dinner with our friend.

Thanks to Levis and weightlifting I experienced one of the easiest fitting room moments of my life. Indecisiveness led us to The Matador where I ordered a shot of tequila on ice and shredded chicken street tacos, blvd style. With an open facade, balmy outside temps and nice music the ambiance was 💯. Oh and I shared one of my tacos with J.

10 oz Modern Times Fruitlands Gose

We ended the night with small pours at Bailey’s Taproom. I ordered ten ounces of Modern Times Fruitlands Gose. Delightful. And somehow we accomplished over ten thousand steps despite sitting in the car all day.


February Eighth Twenty Fifteen

Breakfast // 1/2 cup old-fashioned rolled oats, 1 cup+ mixed frozen blueberries, 1 banana, and water > blended into a smoothie.

Lunch // Big ASS salad with mixed greens, red leaf lettuce, mushrooms, onion, tomatoes, pickled peppers, carrot ribbons, coconut bacon, and thousand island dressing.

Dinner // Instant Pot soup (rice, broth, white carrots, daikon radish, celery, onion, garlic, and ginger). It was really thick due to the quantity of rice I used, but absolutely delicious. I think I would use 1/4-1/2 cup vs 1 cup of rice next time. Toast (3 slices)

Snacks // Complete cookie, apple, coconut bacon, and carrot.


None to report.


Photographed The Complete Cookies that arrived from Amazon today. They’re huge and delicious. My set came with 6 different flavors.

Organized notes.

Wrote a few posts.


Fed Mulder his new beta food, I think he likes it much better. The pieces are smaller and easier for him to grab.

Had a chat with Bluehost over this site and the SSL cert error I was getting for about an hour. Of course it fixed itself right before the chat started (post 30 minute wait time). I asked what the reason was and received a scripted response that wasn’t really the answer. Hrmpfh.

Keep thinking about how I need to send out Cameron’s birthday and Christmas gift, but am at a loss of what things a 13 year old boy without access to the internet might want or be able to use. I’d love to get him classes with Treehouse if internet weren’t an issue. Need to get on that.

Read too many comments on a Happy Healthy Vegan video and realized I want nothing to do with that sect of the community. All I can say is ‘be the good you want to see in the world’. People need to stop practicing reverse activism. 


Realized I’ve been exceptionally good at making tea lately and drinking ∅. Finally drank a cup of chamomile after dinner.



Weekend Recap No. 1

I want to practice more journaling so here we are with a weekend recap.

Let’s start with Friday

I’ve been working at catching up on subscription box reviews over at FYS and I feel satisfied and overwhelmed at the same time. Jeremy has asked me if there is a point I should just call it even and not worry about back posting. The thing is they’re a resource for myself and anyone else, so I don’t think I can let that go so easily.

Friday workout was a streaks (everyday), 13 mile bike ride, and a walk around the neighborhood.

While walking I’m always inspired with writing ideas that I never have time to come back to or the flow isn’t the same when back in front of the keyboard. Today I thought up chapter titles for a memoir.

Bulimic for a Week.

That Lesbian Haircut.

I also came up with a recipe that I made for dinner when I got home. It used Gardein beefless tips, white mushrooms, spaghetti—which I thought was angel hair, but wasn’t—onion, and beefless vegetable stock base.

I cooked the tips and set them aside. Sliced the mushrooms and onions and started sautéing them in a little bit of olive oil. Brought water to a boil in a too-small pot. Whisked up about a cup of broth and 1/2 cup of plant milk with 2 tablespoons corn starch. Brought broth to a boil and added cornstarch milk mixture to create a savory brown gravy. Cooked the noodles. Then mixed everything in a big pan: noodles, gravy, mushroom-onion mixture, tips, and a few extra spices. I would call it a stroganoff, but I don’t know. It was really good!

While eating we started the movie Sicario with Emily Blunt and Benicio del Toro. Highly recommend. A++ The music was fantastically different and went straight into my veins. Love that! The soundtrack is available on Spotify.


I got up and made these pancakes from ground up oats (oat flour), banana, pb, baking powder, and plant milk. They were good, but not as stiff when it came to flipping as I would like. I would modify the recipe and add a little chia flour or something. I’ve made so many pancakes that are healthier leaning that have a moist center. Is that just the way healthy vegan pancakes are? I don’t remember standard omnivore pancakes and their texture. My go-to vegan buttermilk ones at FYS aren’t like that so I’m not sure what it is. Maybe the chia flour makes all the difference.

I worked on FYS posts for quite awhile and then decided to venture out for errands. Jeremy was resting from his cold so it was a rare solo adventure.

I dropped recycling off at the recycling center, which I don’t normally have to do, but the ones at our complex have continuously stayed full. Also, dropped off a box for Goodwill.

Then Safeway. The day before the Super Bowl. In the afternoon. I’m brilliant.

Maneuvering around the store wasn’t bad just the checkout lanes. I bought potato varieties, broccoli, parsley, cilantro, juices, kombucha, mushrooms, bananas, oranges, apples, frozen fruit, bread, seltzer water, and probably some other stuff.

It seemed like a lot of stuff or about what we normally get, but like half the price. I don’t know if it’s Jeremy or the combo of us together, but we like to impulse shop and I seemed not to do that whilst by myself.

Got home and started making homemade fries and a potato-based nacho cheese sauce. Inspired by High Carb Hannah’s latest video.

Went upstairs and wrote some more.

Later around eight we watched The One I Love (imdb) with Mark Duplass and Elisabeth Moss. Written by Justin Lader. Directed by Charlie McDowell. Produced by the Duplass Brothers.

I’m now convinced I’ll watch anything the Duplass brothers are involved with.

Because this movie doesn’t go anywhere you’d expect and that is so invigorating. Maybe that means the trailer was really good too, because it was misleading. I remember feeling that way about Fight Club too.

A few months back we watched Creep, another movie with Mark Duplass and I think written by him too. Same similar invigorating suspenseful feelings. Very original stories and concepts.


Made hash browns from a package, but added mushrooms, red pepper, and onion. Cooked them in the griddler for about 20 minutes-until the top was crispy. Very tasty and a go-to lately.

Then I spent all day writing old posts/reviews.

Had leftover noodles sometime in the middle of the day with kalamata olives, nooch, peperoncinos, and mushrooms. Very good. Obvie.

Didn’t watch any of the Super Bowl except came down for half time. I go through phases with football and I’m currently on an out phase. I was thinking about how I don’t like Coldplay while watching them, but then thinking that I would be dancing and having fun if I was there sooooo why not just ‘be’ like you are there and enjoy it? Does that make sense?

Wrote some more. Then decided to wax my bikini area with these strips I had. That was only the second time I’ve waxed down there, the last time was when I was 20 or 21 and it didn’t go well. This time went significantly better in the sense I didn’t get hot wax on a favorite shirt and hair actually came out. What even?

There’s nothing more rewarding or satisfying then knowing you didn’t scream while looking at tufts of pubes matted into floral-esque pink wax.

Wrote. Went to bed. Couldn’t sleep. Read more of The Boys in the Boat and finally succumbed to sleep around 1 am.

Eat more veggies. xx